where is "home"?

haha..great feeling to be at your local home..but don´t even approximately feel like it. I hate those conversations I need to listen to since DAYS..everyday the same, round and round, it makes me sick!!
Of course I can understand that its not a great feeling to be ill in that way, yeah I understand that..but could we PLEASE talk about ANYTHING else now??
I really dont mean it angrily or something..and I really dont wanna say that they were extremely annoying today..I just cant listen anymore..
who cares about what I think? who cares about my sorrow? who talks about that round and round?? who sees that it makes me sick to go back to this horrible school on monday? who would understand?
well...one man always understands, Jesus! I dont know what I would do if I wouldnt know hes listening, even when I tell him the same things a thousand times..
what I also got are some wonderful friends. but nobody really understands - apart from one person - what I feel at the moment..
sometimes I have the feeling that all of them are only interested in keeping me here because they want to have me here..I wonder why because they don´t really share that much time with me..
they simply cant understand that I hate to be here and that all I wanna do is go somewhere else to live a life thats worth living (dont wanna say my life here isnt worth living - life is ALWAYS worth living..but u know..).
Theres only one person who understands and she would let me go..because she knows as I know that we are FRIENDS..and we will stay friends, wherever we go or whatever comes our way..I´m so thankful that you placed her next to me Jesus..think I would despair of this life if I wouldnt have her..!
Jesus I really try to cling to the cross and I think thats the only thing that gives me strength at all! I really dont wanna be depressive or something and actually I´m really not..the only thing that makes me is this fuckin school I hate soooo much...and the fact that I don´t have a clue how it all should go on after school, no matter if I break up or if I do my ABI..help me out of this personal hell..it burns me!