Im gonna break through

so I sit here in school having two hours free..
learned for one hour but Ive got the feeling it wasnt worth it...I dont now how to make it until monday..I really dont know..but Ill learn and learn and learn..
Ill do nothing but learning..except one thing:
Praying!
I really thought about sitting five hours in front of a wall..praying! and ill do that.
and Im gonna pray everyday at least one hour..and Im gonna go for a walk everyday..because when I went outside yesterday I just felt good after it..because I had some peace in my heart. and thats it what I realize every and every time I go for a walk...
And Im gonna read english books to improve my english...when this examination on monday is over.
Im gonna do useful things for my life. Im gonna clean up - my room and also my soul.
my room becos I need to throw away some things of the past. And my soul becos I need to get rid of old stuff and hurtings. get rid of the mad past becos it shouldnt enchain me in the presence..
thats what Im gonna do..and this time Im really gonna fight..becos this time Im strong enough to get through this all.
I want a clean life. I wanna be full of Gods love - PURE love and not mixed up with something mad! I wanna get radical in everything I do! Im goona break down the walls! Im gonna break through!!