changing me

I´m so glad to have holidays, and today it was a good day..I´ve been to the jugendwerk to talk to steffi, drink a lot of coffee and I helped her a little bit.
I like it there, it´s a place full of warmth and love, I love the people because they are so friendly and open-hearted.
I made a decision..this summer I wanna start again...start again to change myself..
there are many things I have to learn and many things that need a lot of work to get changed..but I know jesus works with me..
I wanna be what that manchaster-guy saw in me: I wanna be a pure love giver!!
I wanna show the world the love that God has for EVERYONE of us! I wanna give love and be a light (of god) in this world. I wanna be friendly and kind. I wanna be a receiver of everything god has to offer, and I also wanna be a giver of all of that to the world!
And I also wanna get things out of my life that destroy me. I don´t want to be aggressive anymore..I know it needs not much to get me aggressive..especially against my parents or somebody else. but I know this is not good, so I wanna train to get it away. It will be a hard therapy..but God is the leader of this therapy and I´m sure it will work.
Just like I wanna learn not to be so damn suspicious and jealous all the time..it´s just like poison for relationships..and if I don´t fight against that I´ll never be happy!
and there are still some things where I destroy myslef and that´s for sure not the plan god has for me..
It will be a long long way to get rid of all these things...and it will be a ahrd way..I know I´ll need to fight..but I know I can make it with gods help..
I don´t think much of psychologists because I´m sure they couldn´t help me at all..And I don´t think I´m sick enough to go there ;)
so jesus, I want YOU to be my guider through this "therapy"..and I´m sure we´re gonna make it..because we´re a team!! and nobody can stop us!!