I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm
I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
(Casting crowns - praise you in this storm)
sometimes its not that easy to lift eyes and hands up to jesus to praise him becos sometimes things r just not goin like i wuld want them to..
Im sad these days.
becos I hate it to say goodbye to people that are important to me..
and I hate not to know what will happen...
and I hate to wait..
well actually its not that Im full of hate atm...just full of sadness.
cos everybodys leavin but me..I will stay here..pretend its good. let u think Im alrite.
and Im gonna go foreward and Im gonna praise the lord becos he is still good!
"all of my life, in every season, you are still god, I have a reason to sing, I have a reason to worship"
God always stays the same and yes, sometimes he gives and sometimes he takes away...and sometimes its painful when he takes away..but he does not take away without a reason..he just takes away what destroys us and what isnt good for us..it hurts, but in the end it will be alrite!
no matter what comes I reli wanna try to fix my eyes upon jesus and to give him praie, every day, every hour, every minute of my life. Give praise, be joyful and thankful all the time becos God gave me so much..he gave me this life to live it just for him.
oh praise him!!
Montag, 29. Dezember 2008
Sonntag, 28. Dezember 2008
friendship..
where did I go wrong?
I lost a friend
somewhere along in the bitterness...
how do the people say?
friends are comin and friends are goin..of course there are some "friends" you lose in your life and its not the first time its happenin to me..
but..its someone I never thought this friendship will end..we knew each other for years, we actually were friends my whole life..
and now she has to concentrate on herself and only wants to have the memories?? gosh how stupid is this???
cant believe it..
actually Im starting to ask myself how the next 5 months will be..
kaddi will leave and actually I dont know anyone here with whom I could do all those things we did the last year..
seems like all my friends are fadin away somehow..the one does not want to know me anymore, the second only sees her boyfriend and has no time for me anyway..
of course there are people I love and who care about me but its just not the same..
with whom should I make music?? it perfectly fits to play music with kaddi..with whom should I drive to Tamm? to the Jesus Treff in Stuttgart? to Goeppingen? with whom should I do stupid fun photoshootings? with whom should I laugh??
with whom should I talk for hours, who would listen to me when I talk about one topic every and every day again? with whom should I dream? with whom should I go to the streets to make music? or with whom sould I go to the streets to pray for people? who will watch walt disney films with me? who would drive to the Ikea with me spontaneously?
whos there to take me in his arms when Im sad?
noone could but her!!
Im gonna miss you...but nevertheless Im sure u r gonna have a good time over there and maybe Im gonna have a good time too..I know its the right way for u to go and I know it wont be that long becos ur only 5 months away and Im gonna visit you..
I know its all not that bad but nevertheless sometimes its hard to think about...
I lost a friend
somewhere along in the bitterness...
how do the people say?
friends are comin and friends are goin..of course there are some "friends" you lose in your life and its not the first time its happenin to me..
but..its someone I never thought this friendship will end..we knew each other for years, we actually were friends my whole life..
and now she has to concentrate on herself and only wants to have the memories?? gosh how stupid is this???
cant believe it..
actually Im starting to ask myself how the next 5 months will be..
kaddi will leave and actually I dont know anyone here with whom I could do all those things we did the last year..
seems like all my friends are fadin away somehow..the one does not want to know me anymore, the second only sees her boyfriend and has no time for me anyway..
of course there are people I love and who care about me but its just not the same..
with whom should I make music?? it perfectly fits to play music with kaddi..with whom should I drive to Tamm? to the Jesus Treff in Stuttgart? to Goeppingen? with whom should I do stupid fun photoshootings? with whom should I laugh??
with whom should I talk for hours, who would listen to me when I talk about one topic every and every day again? with whom should I dream? with whom should I go to the streets to make music? or with whom sould I go to the streets to pray for people? who will watch walt disney films with me? who would drive to the Ikea with me spontaneously?
whos there to take me in his arms when Im sad?
noone could but her!!
Im gonna miss you...but nevertheless Im sure u r gonna have a good time over there and maybe Im gonna have a good time too..I know its the right way for u to go and I know it wont be that long becos ur only 5 months away and Im gonna visit you..
I know its all not that bad but nevertheless sometimes its hard to think about...
Sonntag, 21. Dezember 2008
how life goes..
lots of stuff is goin on in my life rite now..
some things are good, others are not that good..
good things are that Im gonna do the worship in DOMINO with Kaddi today..and Im sure both of us will enjoy it just to give praise to the lord. Becos we learned that its not about how it sounds or that it sounds perfectly, but about our hearts. and I think we both know how to do that.
Before DOMINO we will go into town today to make some street music.
Worship God on the streets of kirchheim.
Its something different, but we wanna do what god told us what we should do last week.
And I think its gonna be good.
Yesterday we organized a breakfast for the people from the streets. it was a good experience to talk to them and stuff, and now Im very excited about christmas eve becos Im gonna go to esslingen to give food to the homeless ppl and Im lookin foreward to this.
At new years eve we r gonna be at the worship night in dettingen and we will play there.
Im reli lookin foreward to this becos I cant imagine anything that would be better than starting the new year with giving praise to the lord.
Im excited what comes in the new year, we will be at the "Neujahrsfreizeit" on the Nordalb and I expect a lot from god.
so lets just see what comes..
the one thing that isnt that awesome is for example that I had my very last day in school at friday..it was a bit strange becos I had to say goodbye to all my classmates..and I realized that some of them got reli important for me..somehow I love them and its hard to know that it will never be like it was before..
At the one hand Im sooo glad that its over and on the other hand I could cry..I dont reli know what comes next..Im gonna do an internship in the church in dettingen, but I still need a place where I can work to earn some money for england..
and there r also a few things that make me sad but I dont wanna write that down here..
thats how life goes..it cant always be just good!
And through all those struggles I still know that God is with me and that he has a plan..hes in control. I trust him.
some things are good, others are not that good..
good things are that Im gonna do the worship in DOMINO with Kaddi today..and Im sure both of us will enjoy it just to give praise to the lord. Becos we learned that its not about how it sounds or that it sounds perfectly, but about our hearts. and I think we both know how to do that.
Before DOMINO we will go into town today to make some street music.
Worship God on the streets of kirchheim.
Its something different, but we wanna do what god told us what we should do last week.
And I think its gonna be good.
Yesterday we organized a breakfast for the people from the streets. it was a good experience to talk to them and stuff, and now Im very excited about christmas eve becos Im gonna go to esslingen to give food to the homeless ppl and Im lookin foreward to this.
At new years eve we r gonna be at the worship night in dettingen and we will play there.
Im reli lookin foreward to this becos I cant imagine anything that would be better than starting the new year with giving praise to the lord.
Im excited what comes in the new year, we will be at the "Neujahrsfreizeit" on the Nordalb and I expect a lot from god.
so lets just see what comes..
the one thing that isnt that awesome is for example that I had my very last day in school at friday..it was a bit strange becos I had to say goodbye to all my classmates..and I realized that some of them got reli important for me..somehow I love them and its hard to know that it will never be like it was before..
At the one hand Im sooo glad that its over and on the other hand I could cry..I dont reli know what comes next..Im gonna do an internship in the church in dettingen, but I still need a place where I can work to earn some money for england..
and there r also a few things that make me sad but I dont wanna write that down here..
thats how life goes..it cant always be just good!
And through all those struggles I still know that God is with me and that he has a plan..hes in control. I trust him.
Montag, 15. Dezember 2008
Ewigkeit!!
Ich will Ewigkeit in meinem Herzen spuern, Ewigkeit!
Ich will Ewigkeit in meinem Innern spuern, Ewigkeit in dir!
Ueberschreite die Grenzen meines kleinen Verstandes,
ich will nah bei dir bleiben, reiche dir jetzt meine hand.
Komm und zieh mich aus dem was mich gefangen haelt,
komm und loese mir die Ketten einer todgeweihten Welt.
Ich will in der Wahrheit leben, will das lieben was du gibst,
will ewigkeit!!
thats the song thats running through my mind all day..its so awesome. Its reli what I want God to do. I reli wanna live in the truth and I want God to make me free of all those things that enchain me.
Today was a strange day..at the one hand it was horrible, becos I sat in school and needed to write a business test...I didnt know anything. Before the test I just thought about runnin away and tryin one last time to learn as much as I can just to get those fckn 5 points..but I already made my decision to leave this school, and so I sat there, waitin till my teacher came with this test and it was such a horrible feeling..never ever wanna do something like that again..
after half an hour there was nothing left that I could write down becos I just didnt know anything..so I gave up and left school...actually forever becos friday will be my last day in this school forever!! somehow it hurts just to know that u didnt won that fight but..I know that God has bigger plans for me and Im sure my lifes gonna be alright!! and Im glad to finally leave this place becos I RELI RELI HATE it!!
at the other hand the day was wonderful becos I went for a walk at the sunset and the sky looked so beautiful and I thought about what Tobi said yesterday when he preached...that the sky at the sunset changes every minute and that this is just like our relationship to God is...
and I walked there and I was so amazed becos the picture I saw was breathtaking!!
everything around me was white...snow all around me..and then the sky was full of red, orange, yellow and rose but also grey and dark blue..and the grey clouds just passed by and I just stopped, stood there stunning with eyes wide open and was like "oh my god you are such a wonderful creator!!!" and when I stood there i listened to a song of samuel harfst which says "Ist es nicht wunderbar an diesem Tag zu sein? Es ist ein Privileg, erachte es nicht als klein.....denn der Herr tut heute noch Wunder, Stunde um Stunde, Tag fuer Tag..."
And I just felt like I would experience a miracle at this moment becos I was allowed to see this beautiful sky..I never felt like this before..and I had such a good prayer time and felt so good afterwards..God is such a peace giver, but he also gives strength!! WOOOW!!
And this song also reminds me evrytime I listen to it that it is such a big gift to be in this world and to be alive!!
And it reli makes me happy that God is my father and that theres nothing that could seperate me from his love. its so good to be his beloved child and I just cant tell how I feel at the moment...Im so amazed and I LOVE my GOD!!
Ich will Ewigkeit in meinem Innern spuern, Ewigkeit in dir!
Ueberschreite die Grenzen meines kleinen Verstandes,
ich will nah bei dir bleiben, reiche dir jetzt meine hand.
Komm und zieh mich aus dem was mich gefangen haelt,
komm und loese mir die Ketten einer todgeweihten Welt.
Ich will in der Wahrheit leben, will das lieben was du gibst,
will ewigkeit!!
thats the song thats running through my mind all day..its so awesome. Its reli what I want God to do. I reli wanna live in the truth and I want God to make me free of all those things that enchain me.
Today was a strange day..at the one hand it was horrible, becos I sat in school and needed to write a business test...I didnt know anything. Before the test I just thought about runnin away and tryin one last time to learn as much as I can just to get those fckn 5 points..but I already made my decision to leave this school, and so I sat there, waitin till my teacher came with this test and it was such a horrible feeling..never ever wanna do something like that again..
after half an hour there was nothing left that I could write down becos I just didnt know anything..so I gave up and left school...actually forever becos friday will be my last day in this school forever!! somehow it hurts just to know that u didnt won that fight but..I know that God has bigger plans for me and Im sure my lifes gonna be alright!! and Im glad to finally leave this place becos I RELI RELI HATE it!!
at the other hand the day was wonderful becos I went for a walk at the sunset and the sky looked so beautiful and I thought about what Tobi said yesterday when he preached...that the sky at the sunset changes every minute and that this is just like our relationship to God is...
and I walked there and I was so amazed becos the picture I saw was breathtaking!!
everything around me was white...snow all around me..and then the sky was full of red, orange, yellow and rose but also grey and dark blue..and the grey clouds just passed by and I just stopped, stood there stunning with eyes wide open and was like "oh my god you are such a wonderful creator!!!" and when I stood there i listened to a song of samuel harfst which says "Ist es nicht wunderbar an diesem Tag zu sein? Es ist ein Privileg, erachte es nicht als klein.....denn der Herr tut heute noch Wunder, Stunde um Stunde, Tag fuer Tag..."
And I just felt like I would experience a miracle at this moment becos I was allowed to see this beautiful sky..I never felt like this before..and I had such a good prayer time and felt so good afterwards..God is such a peace giver, but he also gives strength!! WOOOW!!
And this song also reminds me evrytime I listen to it that it is such a big gift to be in this world and to be alive!!
And it reli makes me happy that God is my father and that theres nothing that could seperate me from his love. its so good to be his beloved child and I just cant tell how I feel at the moment...Im so amazed and I LOVE my GOD!!
Sonntag, 14. Dezember 2008
Gods so GOOD!
its so funny..:D
I almost got crazy before we got on stage yesterday...but it was so good. it was better than I thought it would be. we reli had fun and there were no real bad faults or something.
its so funny how often we are sooo excited about something that isnt that bad at all.
I think Im on a good way to to learn and to understand that God has everything in his hands.
hes in control, thats the most important thing. becos when he is I dont have to be.
The evenin yesterday was so good.
The shows of Flo Ostertag, Stubi live band, Ceil and especially of Samuel harfst were so amazing. I just love listening to awesome music.
And today weve been to tamm to the prayer day of soul devotion.
and it also was pretty good becos we had a good prayer time and a good worship time and a good walk through beautiful little Tamm ;)
Afterwards we went to the 3D and I loved what Tobi said in his sermon..it reminded me again of the fact that God is such a peace giver. that I can get calm near him and that the relationship to him is so exciting.
when Kaddi and me were prayin we got a new vision.
Im so excited about this and it made me so happy that we both had the same stuff God told us.
on tuesday we will go to stuttgart to make some music on the streets.
lets see what happens. its something completely new for us..and Im excited what Gods gonna do there.
Im so happy because God is a good God. Hes beautiful. Hes graceful. Hes almighty. Hes in control. He is GOD. and Im his beloved child.
isnt that a reason just to be happy??
I almost got crazy before we got on stage yesterday...but it was so good. it was better than I thought it would be. we reli had fun and there were no real bad faults or something.
its so funny how often we are sooo excited about something that isnt that bad at all.
I think Im on a good way to to learn and to understand that God has everything in his hands.
hes in control, thats the most important thing. becos when he is I dont have to be.
The evenin yesterday was so good.
The shows of Flo Ostertag, Stubi live band, Ceil and especially of Samuel harfst were so amazing. I just love listening to awesome music.
And today weve been to tamm to the prayer day of soul devotion.
and it also was pretty good becos we had a good prayer time and a good worship time and a good walk through beautiful little Tamm ;)
Afterwards we went to the 3D and I loved what Tobi said in his sermon..it reminded me again of the fact that God is such a peace giver. that I can get calm near him and that the relationship to him is so exciting.
when Kaddi and me were prayin we got a new vision.
Im so excited about this and it made me so happy that we both had the same stuff God told us.
on tuesday we will go to stuttgart to make some music on the streets.
lets see what happens. its something completely new for us..and Im excited what Gods gonna do there.
Im so happy because God is a good God. Hes beautiful. Hes graceful. Hes almighty. Hes in control. He is GOD. and Im his beloved child.
isnt that a reason just to be happy??
Samstag, 13. Dezember 2008
aaah!!
this is so damn crazy..
Kaddi and me r reli playin at the christmasrock tonite..
and the more I think about the more I get a reeeeli bad feeling about it..
not becos I think we r not good enough..but becos there will be many ppl and I will be soooooo excited, who knows what Im gonna do wrong when Im excited??
huuuuh I dont wanna think about that..
I was lying awake the half night and Im not even tired.
Im tryin to do as many other things as possible to do everything but not think about this evenin..
I even watered the flowers, thats something I didnt do for 3 years^^
I see, I get crazy!! :D
actually I believe that god will make it alright..why shouldnt he? we are his children and he loves us. We just need to pray..and thats what Im gonna do..
Kaddi and me r reli playin at the christmasrock tonite..
and the more I think about the more I get a reeeeli bad feeling about it..
not becos I think we r not good enough..but becos there will be many ppl and I will be soooooo excited, who knows what Im gonna do wrong when Im excited??
huuuuh I dont wanna think about that..
I was lying awake the half night and Im not even tired.
Im tryin to do as many other things as possible to do everything but not think about this evenin..
I even watered the flowers, thats something I didnt do for 3 years^^
I see, I get crazy!! :D
actually I believe that god will make it alright..why shouldnt he? we are his children and he loves us. We just need to pray..and thats what Im gonna do..
Donnerstag, 11. Dezember 2008
mit jedem deiner fehler
Ich will nicht bei dir klingeln und ich tu es doch
ich will nicht an dich denken und ich tu es immernoch
ich will nicht von dir reden, vom singen ganz zu schweigen
ich schaem mich fast dass du dich immernoch in meine lieder schleichst
ich hab versucht mir einzureden dass du ja eigentlich gar nicht so schoen bist,
dass du bescheuert bist und nichts verstehst,
dass wir nicht fuereinander bestimmt sind
mit jedem deiner fehler,
mit jedem deiner fehler,
mit jedem deiner fehler lieb ich dich mehr!
(philipp poisel)
Weißt du was du mir bedeutest?
Auf einem Platz in meinem Herz
steht dein Name an der Wand
und ich will, dass du es erfährst
Ich werde immer an dich glauben,
egal was auch passiert
Manche singen von Liebe
Ich sang die ganze Zeit von dir
(Tomte)
yeah, its u I sang about all the time..only you..
whatever that means
und jetzt???
ich will nicht an dich denken und ich tu es immernoch
ich will nicht von dir reden, vom singen ganz zu schweigen
ich schaem mich fast dass du dich immernoch in meine lieder schleichst
ich hab versucht mir einzureden dass du ja eigentlich gar nicht so schoen bist,
dass du bescheuert bist und nichts verstehst,
dass wir nicht fuereinander bestimmt sind
mit jedem deiner fehler,
mit jedem deiner fehler,
mit jedem deiner fehler lieb ich dich mehr!
(philipp poisel)
Weißt du was du mir bedeutest?
Auf einem Platz in meinem Herz
steht dein Name an der Wand
und ich will, dass du es erfährst
Ich werde immer an dich glauben,
egal was auch passiert
Manche singen von Liebe
Ich sang die ganze Zeit von dir
(Tomte)
yeah, its u I sang about all the time..only you..
whatever that means
und jetzt???
Dienstag, 9. Dezember 2008
regrets
I think way too much these days..
I think about the past and about my regrets..about things Ive done that I better shuldnt have done. I think about the things Ive done that changed my life radically.
about the things that destroyed me and about the things that hurt me.
In the past 3 years my life changed a lot.
I even cant reli remember a lot of things in my life that happened before..
I changed a lot through this time. I did some things right and they were good. Ive been growing in these years and I reached some things I never even dreamed about.
I got to know wonderful people in these years and Im sure that a few of them God gave me becos he found it right for me to have them by my side.
But in those years I also did lots of things I wish I would never have done.
I said words I wish I never said, I made decisions which I wish I would have never made. I gave my trust and a part of me to people and I regret it. Sometimes I wish I wouldnt have been so open for some things and less curious about the stuff the world offers.
It hurts sometimes to realize that things happened in your life that arent okay..
and you cant blandish those things becos u just KNOW it wasnt good.
I have to live with these regrets, I can ask God for forgiveness and when he says Im forgiven I am. But I have to learn to forgive myself and thats the hardest part about it.
and yeah..sometimes I hate you and me for all the things we did..:(
I know Im allowed to be sad sometimes and I know its good to be becos it helps me to work through all this stuff..it hurts sometimes to admit to yourself that u did so many things wrong..I goin through this now..
If I had a chance for another try,
I wouldn’t change a thing
It's made me all of who I am inside
And if I could thank god
That I am here, and that I am alive
And everyday I wake
I tell myself a little harmless lie
The whole wide world is mine
The summers gone, the years have passed,
My friends have changed, a few did last,
The smallest dreams got pushed aside,
The largest ones that changed my life,
And all I wish for was come to pass
From rock and roll, to love and cash
It’s all success if it’s what you need
Do what you like and do it honestly
If I had a chance for another try,
I wouldn’t change a thing
It's made me all of who I am inside
And if I could thank god
That I am here, and that I am alive
And everyday I wake
I tell myself a little harmless lie
The whole wide world is mine
I wish I could say that I wuldnt change a thing..but I would..
I dont know if my life would have been better in some parts if I would have behaved different, but I would change some things if I could..
yeah maybe I made the DECISION to love YOU a few years ago..
and its just like I said..u cant turn your back on decisions..so what now?
was this decision forever?
I think about the past and about my regrets..about things Ive done that I better shuldnt have done. I think about the things Ive done that changed my life radically.
about the things that destroyed me and about the things that hurt me.
In the past 3 years my life changed a lot.
I even cant reli remember a lot of things in my life that happened before..
I changed a lot through this time. I did some things right and they were good. Ive been growing in these years and I reached some things I never even dreamed about.
I got to know wonderful people in these years and Im sure that a few of them God gave me becos he found it right for me to have them by my side.
But in those years I also did lots of things I wish I would never have done.
I said words I wish I never said, I made decisions which I wish I would have never made. I gave my trust and a part of me to people and I regret it. Sometimes I wish I wouldnt have been so open for some things and less curious about the stuff the world offers.
It hurts sometimes to realize that things happened in your life that arent okay..
and you cant blandish those things becos u just KNOW it wasnt good.
I have to live with these regrets, I can ask God for forgiveness and when he says Im forgiven I am. But I have to learn to forgive myself and thats the hardest part about it.
and yeah..sometimes I hate you and me for all the things we did..:(
I know Im allowed to be sad sometimes and I know its good to be becos it helps me to work through all this stuff..it hurts sometimes to admit to yourself that u did so many things wrong..I goin through this now..
If I had a chance for another try,
I wouldn’t change a thing
It's made me all of who I am inside
And if I could thank god
That I am here, and that I am alive
And everyday I wake
I tell myself a little harmless lie
The whole wide world is mine
The summers gone, the years have passed,
My friends have changed, a few did last,
The smallest dreams got pushed aside,
The largest ones that changed my life,
And all I wish for was come to pass
From rock and roll, to love and cash
It’s all success if it’s what you need
Do what you like and do it honestly
If I had a chance for another try,
I wouldn’t change a thing
It's made me all of who I am inside
And if I could thank god
That I am here, and that I am alive
And everyday I wake
I tell myself a little harmless lie
The whole wide world is mine
I wish I could say that I wuldnt change a thing..but I would..
I dont know if my life would have been better in some parts if I would have behaved different, but I would change some things if I could..
yeah maybe I made the DECISION to love YOU a few years ago..
and its just like I said..u cant turn your back on decisions..so what now?
was this decision forever?
Montag, 8. Dezember 2008
your beautiful eyes
how ironic it is..
Im talkin about ur eyes all the time and now I find this song:
your beautiful eyes stare right into mine
and sometimes i think of you late at night
i don't know why
i wanna be somewhere where you are
i wanna be where...
your here, your eyes are lookin into mine
so baby, make me fly
my heart has never felt this way before
i'm lookin through your
i'm lookin through your eyes..
i wake up, i'm alive
in only a little while, i'll cry
cause your my lullaby
so baby, come hold me tight
cause i, i wanna be everything you need
i wanna be where...
your here, your eyes are lookin into mine
so baby, make me fly
my heart has never felt this way before
i'm lookin through your
i'm lookin through your eyes..
just as long as your mine
i'll be your everything tonight
let me love you, kiss you
baby, let me miss you
let me see your...
dream about, dream about your eyes
eyes, eyes, beautiful eyes...
its enough to think about ur eyes to make me feel like I wuld sit in a rollercoaster..
I suddenly cant eat even one more piece of chocolate..
I know I gave it all to God and I trust in him..I know hes gonna make it alright somehow..I just dont know what I culd do to make it a bit less ridiculous..
u must think Im so stupid...and actually u even r right with that...
but what shuld I do? Cant do anything against my feelings...so please dont say Im stupid..
Im talkin about ur eyes all the time and now I find this song:
your beautiful eyes stare right into mine
and sometimes i think of you late at night
i don't know why
i wanna be somewhere where you are
i wanna be where...
your here, your eyes are lookin into mine
so baby, make me fly
my heart has never felt this way before
i'm lookin through your
i'm lookin through your eyes..
i wake up, i'm alive
in only a little while, i'll cry
cause your my lullaby
so baby, come hold me tight
cause i, i wanna be everything you need
i wanna be where...
your here, your eyes are lookin into mine
so baby, make me fly
my heart has never felt this way before
i'm lookin through your
i'm lookin through your eyes..
just as long as your mine
i'll be your everything tonight
let me love you, kiss you
baby, let me miss you
let me see your...
dream about, dream about your eyes
eyes, eyes, beautiful eyes...
its enough to think about ur eyes to make me feel like I wuld sit in a rollercoaster..
I suddenly cant eat even one more piece of chocolate..
I know I gave it all to God and I trust in him..I know hes gonna make it alright somehow..I just dont know what I culd do to make it a bit less ridiculous..
u must think Im so stupid...and actually u even r right with that...
but what shuld I do? Cant do anything against my feelings...so please dont say Im stupid..
Freitag, 5. Dezember 2008
growin..
the more I think about what to do the more I confused I become..
Actually at the moment I think it would be best to do nothing, but becos I know I couldnt live with it I best wanna send this stupid shit I wrote per mail so it would be done and I wouldnt have to care about if I should do it or not any longer...it would be the easiest way..but for sure not the best..
today was a bad day...when I woke up this mornin my only wish was to stay in bed and sleep for another 5 hours..
I wasnt motivated becos I knew I would have school and afterwards I would have to clean the parish hall and I would come home at 3.30pm..so my half friday was full of things I didnt like to do..
the first good thing today was when I started to watch the king of narnia dvd..it saved my day..and it was also very nice to meet some cool people in dettingen at the release party of the konficamp CD..its always good to meet great people...but all in all it just wasnt my day..
and everytime when there are those days it feels like I would take at least 2 steps back..
I know I really grew in my identity in the last year..
I did steps foreward, for example I went to people and said something to them just becos God said I should do it, and I did it becos I wanted to be obedient..and in the end I always figured out it was good that I brought myself to do things I actually wouldnt have done if God wouldnt have told me..becos the reaction of those people has always been positive and I grew a lot through conversations, steps I took and all that stuff..
but Im still growing..and sometimes it can be very painful to grow...
Actually at the moment I think it would be best to do nothing, but becos I know I couldnt live with it I best wanna send this stupid shit I wrote per mail so it would be done and I wouldnt have to care about if I should do it or not any longer...it would be the easiest way..but for sure not the best..
today was a bad day...when I woke up this mornin my only wish was to stay in bed and sleep for another 5 hours..
I wasnt motivated becos I knew I would have school and afterwards I would have to clean the parish hall and I would come home at 3.30pm..so my half friday was full of things I didnt like to do..
the first good thing today was when I started to watch the king of narnia dvd..it saved my day..and it was also very nice to meet some cool people in dettingen at the release party of the konficamp CD..its always good to meet great people...but all in all it just wasnt my day..
and everytime when there are those days it feels like I would take at least 2 steps back..
I know I really grew in my identity in the last year..
I did steps foreward, for example I went to people and said something to them just becos God said I should do it, and I did it becos I wanted to be obedient..and in the end I always figured out it was good that I brought myself to do things I actually wouldnt have done if God wouldnt have told me..becos the reaction of those people has always been positive and I grew a lot through conversations, steps I took and all that stuff..
but Im still growing..and sometimes it can be very painful to grow...
Dienstag, 2. Dezember 2008
fix my eyes upon him
I reli still feel like I would soar up on the winds of love to my heavenly father..
this mornin when I drove to school I had such a good time..
everyone around me was totally goin crazy becos of a stupid test we wrote..
I didnt kno anything about the stuff we needed to learn but its a reli unimportant subject so who cares? so I sat in the car, listened to some music and just felt like I would fly in another atmosphere, knowin god was sooo there!!
that was so amazing..I was almost pissed off when I needed to get off the car to go into school to write that test..;)
At the moment it reli feels good..almost everything feels like its just okay becos I go with him, IN him.
When I just fix my eyes upon Jesus it gets easier to go every single step..becos I know hes in control..
still theres one thing where I dont know what to do..but I know that God will show me..I trust in him...and I reli wanna fix my eyes more and more on jesus..because he gives me everlasting life! HE and NOONE else!!
Im thinkin about doing an internship in a church near my town...it could be reli interesting, and if God wants me to do that Im gonna do it...Im ready to go for whatever he has for me..
becos I know he only got the best for me..and Im so glad about it..
I wanna go on soar with him on high with the winds of love...what could be better???
this mornin when I drove to school I had such a good time..
everyone around me was totally goin crazy becos of a stupid test we wrote..
I didnt kno anything about the stuff we needed to learn but its a reli unimportant subject so who cares? so I sat in the car, listened to some music and just felt like I would fly in another atmosphere, knowin god was sooo there!!
that was so amazing..I was almost pissed off when I needed to get off the car to go into school to write that test..;)
At the moment it reli feels good..almost everything feels like its just okay becos I go with him, IN him.
When I just fix my eyes upon Jesus it gets easier to go every single step..becos I know hes in control..
still theres one thing where I dont know what to do..but I know that God will show me..I trust in him...and I reli wanna fix my eyes more and more on jesus..because he gives me everlasting life! HE and NOONE else!!
Im thinkin about doing an internship in a church near my town...it could be reli interesting, and if God wants me to do that Im gonna do it...Im ready to go for whatever he has for me..
becos I know he only got the best for me..and Im so glad about it..
I wanna go on soar with him on high with the winds of love...what could be better???
Montag, 1. Dezember 2008
soar like an eagle..
Im reli amazed of how God is using me when I dont even realize it!!
today a girl told me that she gets inspired everytime she hears something of me or when we have SBK..
thats so cool to know becos I wouldnt think that ppl think in that way of me..
and the funny thing is that I reli esteem her because shes such a nice and such a lovely girl with so much love for the world around her.
I reli like her and I hope God tells me some more stuff about her so that I can encourage her!
another great thing about today is that I realized how big my fathers love must be for me..
and that he reli wants to make me free.
a few weeks ago someone gave me a picture of an eagle that is breakin the chains..hes cryin but hes flying away..that means he gets free and hes flying..
that was a prophetc picture for me, and I love it. It encourages me everytime I look at it and I believe that God will make me free from all the wrong thoughts and all the lies that are in my heart. he will make me free from the pain I experienced becos ppl treated me wrong.
he will make my soul free from sorrows and doubts.
and today someone sent me a CD they just recorded..and theres one song where God just showed me one sentence..it says "oh father, father look, my wings they fly...on the winds of love to soar with you on high."
it feels like that would be an addition to the picture.
I just had such a good resting time in gods arms backwards..it was sooo good that I almost fell asleep...Its unbelievable becos I reli didnt sleep that good the last time..but when I wake up again I felt reli fit and reli good. Just like God put some strength into my heart again so that I can go on tomorrow and the rest of the week.
Everythings pretty exhausting at the moment and I dont feel good about goin to school becos I know it will be over soon and Im pretty scared about what comes afterwards..but I know that God has a plan that is bigger than my sorrow..and I think I know what Ive got to do..its just a bit hard becos I know its not reli what my parents want me to do but..its my way, not theirs! thats something they need to learn and something I have to live with!
God is with me, he makes me strong. And Im gonna soar like an eagle..with his love under my waings..he will carry me!
today a girl told me that she gets inspired everytime she hears something of me or when we have SBK..
thats so cool to know becos I wouldnt think that ppl think in that way of me..
and the funny thing is that I reli esteem her because shes such a nice and such a lovely girl with so much love for the world around her.
I reli like her and I hope God tells me some more stuff about her so that I can encourage her!
another great thing about today is that I realized how big my fathers love must be for me..
and that he reli wants to make me free.
a few weeks ago someone gave me a picture of an eagle that is breakin the chains..hes cryin but hes flying away..that means he gets free and hes flying..
that was a prophetc picture for me, and I love it. It encourages me everytime I look at it and I believe that God will make me free from all the wrong thoughts and all the lies that are in my heart. he will make me free from the pain I experienced becos ppl treated me wrong.
he will make my soul free from sorrows and doubts.
and today someone sent me a CD they just recorded..and theres one song where God just showed me one sentence..it says "oh father, father look, my wings they fly...on the winds of love to soar with you on high."
it feels like that would be an addition to the picture.
I just had such a good resting time in gods arms backwards..it was sooo good that I almost fell asleep...Its unbelievable becos I reli didnt sleep that good the last time..but when I wake up again I felt reli fit and reli good. Just like God put some strength into my heart again so that I can go on tomorrow and the rest of the week.
Everythings pretty exhausting at the moment and I dont feel good about goin to school becos I know it will be over soon and Im pretty scared about what comes afterwards..but I know that God has a plan that is bigger than my sorrow..and I think I know what Ive got to do..its just a bit hard becos I know its not reli what my parents want me to do but..its my way, not theirs! thats something they need to learn and something I have to live with!
God is with me, he makes me strong. And Im gonna soar like an eagle..with his love under my waings..he will carry me!
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